advising creeps

lol ok so cute okcupid story. after this i promise ill get a life and stop okcupiding then blogging about it. i swear. 

so this dude in his late 30s messages me. i wish i didn’t block him because then i could give you more details about him. suffice it to say i could not have been more turned off by him. he’s from london, first of all, im from the us. we had like 0% match and like 90% enemy. his profile was super bland. and his message went like this “hello beauty queen from the USA”


normally i would just hit delete but i was feeling extra feisty. so i messaged back saying something kind of sassy like “you sound like my kind of man. a man who ignores all the interesting things in my profile and compares me to one of the most superficial categories of people in the USA who go viral on youtube because of their idiotic responses to questions. 

he said something again about my looks, i made another sassy remark.

then he said something like “i used to use gentle messages on here but they never got any response”

his broken english and the fact that he was a working class guy tugged a little at my heart strings.

so then i spent about 20 minutes advising him on improving his profile. i told him the reason he wasn’t getting responses was not gentle messages, but his bland profile where he said he was “shy” and just gave basics about his job.

i told him to write something about what he loves, what makes him come alive. what his dreams are. what makes him quirky (i strongly believe all humans are quirky) and what makes him sad. 

his profile was much better after my advising session. 

but then he kept messaging that he wanted to be my friend and it was getting annoying and i blocked him.

i need to get a life.






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